“degrade to the status of a mere object.”
Our world has changed. Things are now taking a turn that everyone speaks about things that in the 80’s or 90’s were hidden, but thank goodness, people are now talking.
Bullying is now a battle, still exists and many will turn the back or eyes to it, but it still happens but many are taking the internet to have a voice and push forward laws about it.
BUT… what about at home? It’s the 21st Century and parents HAVE the need to teach their children how to behave and how to act regarding other people and the world itself. Sometimes is not easy, but I have a tip to give.
Not that I am the best mother in the world! But I try to.
Parenting doesn’t come with instructions, and neither the tips from your family and friends will do much good because your child is unique and you are unique and you want several things to be different from what you grew up with or simply you notice that a new world, new rules and new things come up and you need to keep up the pace with how the world is doing. Fact!
One of the things I have been analysing is that people still objectifies things and person. Including ourselves!
To Objectify, is giving a negative category to something or someone.
I am Too fat, that person is too fat, or you are too skinny!
Wrong. Absolutely wrong. Children will grow up thinking that (and they are right) a label in society about being Fat or too thin, or too tall or too big, etc, is a normal. What does that bring? Exactly: low self-esteem! Meaning they will be a target because they will be shy or angry at their bodies. Not just about them…. but about others as well.
Many clothing brands are selling jeans for kids in Extra Slim… I don’t buy it. Not because my son won’t fit in them, because I don’t agree that a pair of jeans for a 4 years old should be extra slim. Is telling you that they have gone from the stupid slim to extra slim, and you should fit in it! No, super wrong! So Primark, change that! All kids clothing are extra slim or slim, in nowhere you have a normal straight cut. Slim clothing will actually stop the blood circulation leading to later varicose veins and clots!
You might be at home trying out clothing and say: “Oh geez I am super fat here!”… You grew up hearing that, so for you it might be normal to say it, but then if you don’t explain, your kids might start calling others fat and calling others fat is a type of bullying, and is not OK, to objectify people like that.
BUT that just not it! Using words as: Ugly, you’re stupid, pathetic, you’re dumb, you can’t do anything right, you simply cannot do it! Well…. That is BULLYING at home! And hearing that boils my blood. I see that so many times in the streets or even in the car park of the school. For me calling someone stupid is the lowest of low. But I noticed that for many is normal. Is not. And not in this century. You will not be considered a “Snowflake” for being hurt just because someone called you Stupid. You are a clever human being that has feelings, and being stupid is not one of your qualities, so why shouldn’t you say that you’re not? Freedom of speech! Anyone can speak so can I! And also: My Space is not to be invade by your negativity!
I need a drink ASAP
How many of us said that, or the simple “I am in need of a cold one”? That is objectifying. Seems ridiculous, but for your child, that tiny computer learning on the first years, is a thing they will grab and memorize as:
“drinking is a good thing that will make my problems go away and I will have fun”. Do I need to say more?
Suppress some words and the world won’t have as many addicts.
I say the same for smokers, drugs, gambling, shopping sprees, etc… and seriously smoking is so last century!
Teach them that writing, painting, exercising, meditation, yoga, playing with legos or cars is a good thing and the best way to release negativity.
Loose the Tags and Categories
Don’t put labels on people, animals or places. Simply teach the kids. Explain to them what is going on and why do it or not. The kids are learning and your teachings are the first things they will go to when doing something or thinking.
“If my Mom said this…. If Daddy does this…. if at my home I do this…” Here is the base for a brilliant stress free teenager and for a future successful adult!
As a mom, my 1st thought is always my son.
Am I being a good teacher at manners, traditions, in how to make things? Am I transferring to him enough nurture and is his self-esteem high and is he a fair person? I honestly think so, he is a brilliant boy. Fun loving little piece of me that has a great future in being whatever he wants to be.
We do not objectify anyone or anything in my house. It’s our way of teaching, our lifestyle and our positive way of seeing the world.
How is yours?